If you’re not a coffee person, or even a morning person, that might change this December with the announcement of a Fellatio Cafe set to open in Paddington, London.
Serving up the tried-and-tested combination of a latte and a blowjob, the Fellatio Cafe is exactly what it sounds like. You select your coffee of choice, and are then handed an iPad where you can select an escort to perform oral sex for a base price of £50, with £10 added for every extra 15 minutes of action. They’ve called it ‘the most expensive coffee in the UK’, but hey, we’re sure the jacked-up price will be no problem for those who are tired of jacking off.
The legality of the whole practice is still somewhat blurry under UK law, although founder Bradley Charvet is confident that “his lawyer is setting everything up.” Charvet says he got the inspiration for the cafe after seeing similar drink-and-suck services offered in Pattaya, Thailand. The cafe is being sponsored by Bumpix, a social network for UK escorts.
Importantly, the cafe also promises that they will be serving up a range of sandwiches and pastries. We love pastry.
A website for the Fellatio Cafe has also been established, where you can grab more insights into what this will actually entail. Their homepage asks “to accompany your coffee, what better than a good relaxing indulgence practiced by professional creamers?” Touché. And as for the ladies who are looking to get off before work, they state that “we also believe in your enjoyment. We are considering to propose a service for female customers.”
Opening on December 5, the Fellatio Cafe will sit in close proximity to a huge potential customer base at the Hilton Hotel in Paddington. It follows the viral trend of restaurants allowing customers to eat nude, but this establishment took it a whole lot further and raised a whole lot more OH&S concerns. You can read an interview with Charvet here, and prepare for your cold drip to get a whole lot steamier if you live in London. In the meantime, look at this very neat flatlay that they’ve kindly supplied for a preview of what to expect:
