This Christmas, one Australian business is letting you give someone the greatest gift of all. No, we’re not talking about unconditional love or unbridled affection or any of that bullshit. We’re talking about a big lump of coal, gift-wrapped with a personal note of 25 words or less.

Yes, two Wollongong bros have decided to invest their precious time into Send Coal – a service that (surprise, surprise) sends people coal this Christmas. At the low price of $19.95, you can get a lump of coal carefully packaged and sent off to a loved one – and remain anonymous if you wish! What a time to be alive. There’s no need to ask if they’ve been naughty or nice, because there’s enough coal for everybody, and we’re guessing that there’s going to be plenty of these packages sitting under the Christmas tree in two week’s time.

“We wanted to bring the old myth to life and give people the opportunity to gift something surprising and irreverent to their friends or family. The actual coal will be nicely gift wrapped and able to be displayed – hopefully it’ll be a bit of a laugh,” creators Luke Szalla and Regan Kerr state. They further suggest the gift as one for “your annoying boss, shit mates, lazy co-workers, ungrateful kids, racist uncles etc.”

Showing that they really do have all the skills of contemporary entrepreneurs, the creators of Send Coal also make powdered smoothies for a living. Is there anything they can’t do? Probably not. Send off a piece of coal right here.

WOLLONGONG REPRESENT.