If I refunded every failed date, I’d be Bezos by now.

A UK woman has gone viral after sharing a text exchange with one of her past suitors, who requested a $6 refund after their first coffee date failed miserably. Presumably to recoup for (ego) damages, the bloke’s invoice was followed by the justification that he’d “prefer to use it on somebody else” (ouch), after the woman cited a lack of chemistry (no shit).

Dodging the fattest of bullets, the woman later revealed that she knew others who’d dated the very same stinge, and directed that he instead donate the money to charity. In response, the chap sent his bank details and said he’d ‘like to decide’ what to do with the cash, proving that frugality is what absolutely no one is looking for in a party. 

Six years since that lad tried to invoice me for a shit date pic.twitter.com/n73IIG13By

— Me, you, Tokyo (@LaurenNotLozza) November 12, 2021

Other victims of the coffee-snatcher said the move was his “MO,” which honestly seems like a worse romantic identifier than having herpes. In other news, if that date who asked what my ‘hobbies’ are is reading this, I’ll send my BSB.